Eclipse

Everything is partially composed, already written, already decomposing in my mind as we sit and title all the things we cannot define. You share your good intentions, and I share my unfounded beliefs. They both settle into eclipse: hopes obscured by truths. I wonder sometimes what good it does to pretend we can be anything other than what we are. The lines were drawn long ago. If we're genuine, then they don't matter. But I can only speak for myself.

Simple

There is nothing simple about this truth of ours, nothing simple about the way the future flickers over our faces when we kiss. He called me out on it and I denied, but he's right. He's right when he says we should have known better than to play in the night and lie in the light. Nothing good ever comes of deception.

Pane

Legendary. Is that what we are? Celebrities in this world of small minds and narrow eyes. They're staring at us. They're glaring at us. How can I keep you safe? I put my hand against yours; there's a window pane between. You're on the outside looking in, and I don't know how to open the door. I have a bad feeling, a foreboding in the pit of my stomach. We're not going to make it, you and I. Not as us. Not as "us." We're not going to make it, and I refuse to drown.

Pure

It only takes a second to see how pure the water is when it rises above our heads. We think of it as a horror, we fear it, we run. But in the end, where are we going? I know where I want to be -- in your arms, in your heart, in your life forevermore. But you're just going to fly away, aren't you? That's my plan too. Will things change? I guess we'll see.

Retrospect

In retrospect, it'd be easy for me to say I don't care, for me to move on because I can't see you and I don't want to. I don't want to think about what was done, and more importantly what wasn't. I don't want to carry this anger with me like a load, a burden I cannot lose. I don't want to hate, because hate is ugly and unproductive and it won't change a thing. But I feel, because I am human, I am me, and you are you, and I'm just so glad you're okay.

Circus

What a whirlwind. What an amazing little trick. What a circus we've created, between the hiding and the chasing and the lying and the reconciling. You hold me close, but you forget that physical distance was never what kept us apart. I'm curious to see how it will go this time around. Curious, and scared.

Civil

This isn't a game we're playing, you know? No one wins, and only I lose. So I'm not interested in being civil when what we're really going for is a melodramatic anti-reunion that's going to confuse us both. I only want what's real, what's sure. Gambling never was my thing. Especially not when it's my heart on the line.

Rainy

I'm hiding. I'm hiding from you because I'm scared. Scared of what I might regret. Scared of what I shouldn't want. Just so frightened of so many things, and tired of all the rest. All the games, all the pretenses. Isn't it stupid for us to go on like this? You know, it doesn't have to be all sunshine and rainbows. We don't have to pretend. I like it when it's rainy out. There's nothing like a storm.

Tradition

I want to believe him. I want to believe him so badly it hurts. And I'm already bleeding. That's my tradition, isn't it? Cut myself off at the knees, rip out my heart with my own bare hands. It's what I do, it's how I live. I take those risks, and I get hurt. But I keep on going, because I want to believe.

Hurl

Every time I think I've got it down, I realize that you're always going to have your hold on me. I can push and pull and run and hide, and I do, Lord knows I do, I try. But there's nothing to keep me from coming back, coming back to you. There's nothing I can do, not when you hurl everything you've got out there. And even though it's not at me, I see it, I see what you can do and who you are and all these things I wish I didn't recognize or want or think that I need. All these things that keep me here, keep me tied to you.

Frosting

A revolution is near, but it always has been, hasn't it dear? They say we can do anything, but then why can't I melt through the walls of ice you've built up? The windows of my little house are frosting, and I'm exhaling puffs of cold air. I don't feel safe here; I don't feel warm. What happened to the heat from your fingers and your smile? What happened to the comfort we created in each other? What happened to everything I held dear? Maybe it's me. Or maybe it's denial.